person man hates triangle man

There's an hour of setup in the morning at work before we open. If I'm bartending downstairs, I often use that time for BNRW (one of the myriad things this blog has stolen or plans to steal from some other blog). Upstairs I don't have that option, but sometimes someone will bring in a CD so we're not stuck with the mystifying inconsistencies of Muzak all day. This morning the CD was Fashion Nugget by Cake. I'd never really listened to Cake before, but an hour of them was enough for me to both (A) figure out that they annoy the living shit out of me and (2) settle into an ornery mood that would stay with me most of the day.

Disliking Cake is the kind of opinion that's frowned upon in the town in which I live, and I could foresee a conversation with someone about it, and so I wanted to figure out exactly what about them bothered me so incredibly much.

I can explain it best visually. In graphic design, a basic term deals with the speed of the design elements: some design is fast, that is it communicates what it needs to at a glance, and some is slow and takes a while to sink in. Successful graphic design usually seeks to combine fast and slow elements, so that information gets across quickly, but there are deeper elements for the viewer who wants to spend a little more time with the design and experience it more fully.

So my problem with Cake is that the design is simply fast, with no slow elements at all. You get exactly what's going on at the very first listen, and in fact the singer enunciates each syllable as if it's the most important, just to make sure you get it, you hear what he's saying, you don't miss part of the joke. But with any song like that, for me it's ha ha, okay, I get it, now turn it off. There's nothing to keep me there, and certainly nothing to keep me coming back.

The vocals are a good hint that the music sucks, but not conclusive: you'll hear similar vocal styles from Barenaked Ladies and They Might Be Giants, but where the former might leave you nauseated like you've had too much Cake, the latter will leave you guessing, wondering what the hell you just heard, and, yes, coming back for repeated listens (and one of the greatest concert experiences, just ask Reid).

The sort of jangly, playful music style might also clue you in, but again, there is the possibility of something good coming out of it. Compare Barenaked Ladies' if-you've-heard-it-once-you've-heard-it-a-thousand-(or-a-million-)times "If I Had A Million Dollars" to Beck's wait-what-did-he-just-say? "Loser", and you'll see what I mean.

In summary:
Cake, Barenaked Ladies = Bad
They Might Be Giants, Beck = Good

(You probably didn't notice that I failed to mention Poi Dog Pondering, who exist somewhere in the middle, but for whom I'll admit a soft spot that's been with me since the halcyon days of my youth. How did they never get discovered by the hippies? Perhaps there is a small modicum of justice in the universe.)